Monday, July 13, 2009

Article For The Newsletter At Convention

The greatest gifts God has given me are a voice and an opinion (and for better or worse, I am very blessed). Over the last three years I have used these gifts to advocate for a group that I think has been let down by the church for generations. Before that I was a cradle Episcopalian who was very active as a youth in the church but had not seriously been to church in about eight years for a myriad of reasons. Most importantly, I think that I had convinced myself that there was no place for me in the church anymore. I used the years after high school making mistake after mistake and “proving” that God and the Episcopal Church had left me far behind. The most important thing I can tell you about my time away was that the longer I stayed away, the more disenchanted I became with the church and the harder it was for me to go back.

When I finally had the courage to come back to the church I began to remember a language that had been forgotten by me long ago. I could once again explain where my heart and my mind intersected and people actually understood what I was talking about. It was such an amazing feeling. As the Diocesan Coordinator for Young Adult Ministries in the Diocese of Atlanta, I have been able to use that language to advocate for a group that I think is largely forgotten and misunderstood in the church world. As youth we are put out in the spotlight and then just expected to quietly integrate into becoming an “adult” member of the parish as soon as we turn eighteen. I think that this is one of the biggest mistakes the church is currently making. In a majority of cases we are not given the skills or support to accomplish this goal and then people wonder why we aren’t filling the pews every Sunday. If we want to be honest, most of us are leaving the Episcopal Church for other denominations or non-denominational churches because it seems like they are the only ones equipping people in their twenties to become vital parts of the church body. I don’t think we are there because we like the theology or the fact that in most cases there is no liturgy, I think we are there because they are the only ones that are giving us community and making us a priority.

So what can we do about that Lauren? Well, I am glad you asked. I think we can start by educating people as to what defines a young adult. And how do we do that Lauren? We give them the opportunity to be in front of people the way the youth are. We are often lumped in with youth in ways that make it hard to define our identity. Our parents aren’t driving us to church on Sunday. We are not living in a school environment that gives us loads of time to spend cultivating our relationship with God. We are out in the real world trying to decide how we will actually survive the next eighty something years without failing and ending up broke and alone. This is something we will struggle with for only you know how many years, because you have been there. Remember?

Do us a favor, let us stand up and tell you who we are. Put us on the pedestal next to youth and allow us to tell you how we are different and why we can’t be lumped together. Let us tell you why we are lost and why we need you to mentor us in the ways of being an adult. It might seem scary, but it isn’t hard. All you do is approach a young adult and say hello and how are you, we will do the rest. We are ready to speak, but unsure of how to ask for that right because we are out of the spotlight. Please don’t forget us…..again.

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